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| Denise Milani |
Denise Milani's breasts are a Czech internet model based in Los Angeles, and are one of the most popular internet models working in the world today. They are currently attached to the chest cavity of one Denise Milani, who has carried them for the entirety of their lives so far. Though Milani herself is also technically a model, she is nowhere near as notable as her breasts; the Wikipedia article on her has been deleted, recreated and re-deleted many times over due to her lack of notability. To them she is just another up-and-coming Eurotrash girl trying to make it in the modelling industry with barely a TV credit to her name. All anyone cares about is those enormous (some would say, oversized) breasts, and if someone tried to write an article on them, no doubt it would be a different story. Why can't people see that she would be a beautiful, intelligent woman without them?
Anyway, let's move on from her before this article gets deleted too.
Denise Milani's breasts were born, along with the rest of her, in the Czech Republic in 1983. According to the attending doctor, both Milani and her boobs were healthy and strong, and that they could be held right away. Although back then they were very small - totally flat, even - so it's doubtful you're even slightly interested in hearing any of this (unless you're into that kind of thing). Let's skim through this part.
The breasts first started to become noticeable when the host was around 11. Even then however, they were little more than tender lumps, about the size of half tennis balls. Although marginally more interesting than before; it seems they still weren't worthy of treatment on a comedy wiki, so again let's skip a few years.
At 15, Milani first started to notice that people rarely looked at her face, or any other part of her, for that matter - save two. Even when she went to her podiatrist to get her feet examined, the doctor never actually looked at the part of the body he specialised in. Instead, passersby, teachers, students and family members alike gaped at her breasts, scrutinising them furiously as if trying to burn the image on to their retinas for all eternity.
She also noticed that men were overly keen to give her free stuff, like food, clothes, money, high school qualifications and, most frequently, full-body massages. This went to such extremes that by the time Milani's breasts were 18, half the boys in school had become apprentice masseurs. The other half were in prison for sexual misconduct.
Throughout all of this however, the breasts themselves noticed nothing.
(Source)
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